Saturday 29 December 2012


We were dresses to convey an impression of ourselves to people, but at the end of day we dress according to our moods or how we feel.  Our outfit reflects the state of our mind. How we are feeling.

When we open our closet door in the morning, we may choose clothes not according to the practical wardrobe consideration but according to our feelings. Our moods can be happy or sad. If we are happy, we tend to select cloth, which is well cut and figure enhancing. They are mostly made up of bright and beautiful fabrics. In the other hand, when we are in a bad mood we gravitate toward baggy tops and jeans, though jeans is consider a happy outfit but its rated below and taken under consideration if paired with appropriate jewelry and shoes.

Our mood gets reflected when we wear a uniform. A good is visible when a uniform is worn that got no creases and paired with bright cardigan or a fancy jacket, whereas the vice verse can be felt when a gray hoodie or a saggy sweater is worn over it.

Other than moods, dresses can reflect what we feel about ourselves. If we have a low self esteem and don’t feel good about our body, we wear clothes that hide us. We also take less effort to look presentable. A positive vibe about ourselves can make us choose more flattering and noticeable outfits. 

Changing our clothes can change our mood. Sometimes we like to use this idea or get trapped in this. So, we sometime wear our favorite outfit to boost our mood. In this way self-esteem and confidence raises up. Whereas, our mood gets darken, if we wear drab, unflattering clothes.

By applying the basic behavioral therapy of fashion application we can turn our low feeling in to a happy one. Avoiding the impulse toward clothes that reflect that bad feeling, we can go for something that we usually choose on a happy day. It’s all like having a chocolate ice cream during a heart break or a fight.

We all deserve to be happy. So, try to choose happy day clothes whenever you are selecting a outfit, irrespective of our moods.


Friday 7 December 2012


"Whether love is all you need or you're Miss Independent, being in love is a whole new world with every relationship. You might be in a passionate affair or a friends-for-life 30-year marriage, but understanding the kind of love you’re in-or used to be in-will help you live happily ever after. The type of love you're in differs between relationships and even different times in your life. Still, you may be more prone to one type of love or another, but a PASSIONATE and SELFLESS one is what girls dreamed of. So, here is a quick preview on how it looks or feels like or how we are benefited by such love.
Passionate in love:
This is the classic romantic love we imagine when we think of a hunk like Wolverine (or, if you want to be old-school, Prince Charming) sweeping us up in his arms. It's intensely satisfying, an emotional and physical tornado that grabs you and whisks you away. While passionate couples might mellow out and become more affectionate over time, they still value strong chemistry and a sense that they were meant to be. Think about “Titanic," where Jack and Rose have a whirlwind romance and vow to never let go.
Passionate lovers bonded by love marriage, tend to have a secure attachment style, meaning that they feel confident and comfortable in relationships. This turns out to be their biggest asset. But, the most challenging things may be balancing the intensity of your love affairs with the other relationships in your life. A rush of love gives you more energy and focus, so you smile more and talk with a higher voice pitch, which makes you more attractive. You even have brighter eyes, rosier cheeks, smoother skin, and fuller lips. All these add up to your beauty.
Selfless in love:
Selfless lovers would do anything for love. Their partners come first no matter how big the sacrifice and they spend more time focusing on what they can give than what they want to get. Their connection is more spiritual than sexual—soul mates to the nth degree. It can be like the movie "The Princess Bride," where Westley nearly dies saving Buttercup and only true love keeps his heart beating. Such relationships can be enormously fulfilling and offer you a great sense of purpose. Although within this while giving everything to another person, you can easily forget that sometimes you need attention too.
Anything too much can hurt. So, here are some ideas, how to balance your love-and life-and surrounding. Because any mess can affect your well-being. Try out these steps along with your love to lead a healthy life:
Give your friends some face time:
Passionate lovers are easily swept away in a flurry of sheets and hours of intense conversation. With all that energy focused on your partner, it's easy to forget that you do have some friends who want to see you too. Plan a girls' night or a coffee date to make sure they still know you care about them. (After all, you will need someone to give you a Kleenex and a hug if you do break up one day.)
Pursue your own interests:
Especially at the beginning of a relationship, passionate couples might want to spend all their time together. Part of keeping passion running high is having a life outside your relationship that you can share with each other.
Show love during fights:
With passions running high, you and your life partner may find yourself in a fair number of fights. Fighting won't harm your relationship, but how you fight does matter. Make sure to focus the conversation on how you feel, listen to your partner's point of view and focus your complaints on the action that upset you, not the person.
Never Block out "self time":
Even selfless people need a little "self time"—time that's carved out for you and only you when you can do whatever your heart desires. Take a long walk, go to a movie, get a massage, get lunch with friends, attend a book club meeting, check out a museum exhibit, whatever you enjoy. You spend so much time tending to other people's needs that it's important to spend a little time addressing your own. So once a week, take some totally guilt-free, indulgent time to enjoy yourself.
Take up journaling:
For someone as other-oriented as you are, your own feelings can get lost in the mix. Journaling every day (even when you feel you have nothing to say) can be a great way to make sure you don't lose touch with your own feelings and needs. Journaling improves psychological health and has even been shown to aid weight loss, so make a habit of it and just put three pages of whatever comes to mind on the page. Writing your own thoughts each day will allow you to be more present for your partner.
Assert your own needs:
Selfless lovers may be more likely to feel that asserting their own needs is an imposition on their partner. In fact, clearly communicating what you need can improve closeness and relationship health so that nothing builds up under the surface over time. You care for your partner so well—let them care for you too sometimes. 

Thursday 6 December 2012


Bad money snafus happen to good people. The common mistakes women make—and what to do instead. Not all women make these mistakes. Not all men avoid them. But these are a few female financial problem areas that have been analyzed, which can lead to major debt and lots of stress.
A 2011 study found that 67% of women have felt guilt about a purchase. But that's not the only opportunity for guilt: There's also staying in a job you feel guilty about abandoning, giving someone money because you feel guilty about their situation and, oh, doing the opposite of what you want when it comes to working after having children because you feel guilty about being a good mom (more on that here).
This guilt effect might not be limited to finances, either. Some studies suggest that women are more inclined than men to feel any kind of guilt. And we'd argue, more likely to bail out their exes, too. But see the next slide for more on that type of financial transgression.
It's long been said that women are more empathetic than men--they're instinctively attuned to what others are thinking and feeling. But one study published in Psychology Today suggests that this empathy isn't an innate quality, it's just that women try harder to empathize. Another study found that women feel equal levels of empathy no matter how they feel about the other person's morality, whereas male empathy is conditional on a moral judgment. In other words, they empathize only if the other person is worthy.
So when women are actively trying to be understanding, and naturally not judging, you get saviors. The savior lends money to her mother/sister/friend/boyfriend/girlfriend/neighbor to alleviate their burdens, by taking on that burden herself. The next time someone else's finances look tight; direct them toward our financial planners instead. Lending money is a lovely gesture, but it's even nicer to help them set up a long-term financial plan.
Women can have trouble saying no. Whether in the office or at home, some women have a hard time advocating for themselves, especially when it means turning down a request. And it's understandable. Studies show that although women who advocate for themselves in the workplace are rewarded with due promotion (nice!), such behavior is often perceived as "aggressive" and "unlikeable" when it's from someone wearing heels (not nice).
But you can do more than just ask nicely to get your money back. It's important that you sign a contract or agreement when borrowing or lending a considerable amount of money. In fact, documents like prenups were created for just this sort of situation.
Everyone knows that a lady can't resist shoes. (Kidding!) But retail therapy, or shopping to influence your mood, is both common and unwise. A survey out of the University of Hertfordshire found that the primary motivation for 79% of respondents to shop was to "cheer them up." Emotional spending is one of the main culprits for bad spending triggers.

"I divorced my husband after seven years together (and two children) and discovered that I did not exist! Nothing, including car insurance and license plates, belonged to me. I had no credit, which I needed for car insurance. Since then, I've been rebuilding my credit, starting with the money I earned from melting down my wedding ring."

We constantly hear from women who spent years taking the hands-off approach to their finances, but are thrust into the responsibility of gaining financial knowledge on their own.
It's crucial to not only build your own credit history (so you can take out loans for major purchases down the road, like a house or car, but also to save for retirement (especially as a woman—here's why) and know the financial basics in case you ever need them.
It's terrifying how many couples don't discuss their finances until something goes terribly wrong. To be fair, the blame for this mistake probably lies equally with both partners. We like to use the term "financial intimacy" to describe a situation where both partners in a relationship have an awareness and mastery of the finances.
You have to put on your own oxygen mask before you can assist others. It's as true in personal finance as it is at 30,000 feet. Waylaying your retirement money for your child's college tuition or draining your savings for summers away at camp will leave your children's support system (you) unbalanced.
Obviously, we leave it to your discretion when deciding which expenses for your children come first, but a situation like the one above isn't good for anybody, including the kids. You're no good to your family if you're no good to yourself. We've discussed before why splurging on yourself (or even just taking care of your expenses!) is so critical to the wellbeing of you and your family.

Wednesday 28 November 2012


We all love our family. Our siblings were our best partner or best friend during our early childhood. But, we tend to replace them as we start moving out and mingle with the world (whether school or college or office). We start to understand things and during any argument try to draw attention toward the age-old mistakes done by our sisters or brothers. Although from the core of our heart we love, care and want to improve our relationship with our siblings. However, we don’t find any way to do so. So, here are some preferred guidelines that can make a difference.

The old quarrels, misunderstandings, or misdeeds can keep you suffocated under your own frustration. Remember anger can only hurt you. Try not to accuse your siblings for their early mischief. Take a conscious effort to forget and forgive those deeds and soon you will find them washed out of your head. Past can be a nice place to troll but not to dwell. Thus, leave the past and move forward.

We don’t speak rubbish to our friends and don’t expect anyone to say so to us, then why there should be an exception for our siblings. Mind your manner whenever you speak. Though that doesn't mean you have to behave formally with you sisters or brothers, but try to be polite and avoid petty comments.

Spending time together improves any relationship and a sibling relationship is not an odd man out. Make it sure that you visit all the parties thrown by your family and siblings. At-least have a meal together if all of you stay in one house. Go out for a vacation with them. Text or call them and try to have a good interactions in their social networking pages. Find out the common things about both of you and go ahead to do those stuffs together. Make a list of things they like and use them as a healthy weapon to win their heart or to choose a perfect present to gift them (there is need of any occasion).

Poking your nose in other’s matters will give a bad impression about your self-dignity and self-control. Give them their space and respect their privacy.  If you feel something is wrong, then with all the possible reasons explain them the consequences, later; when both of you are alone. Two persons always have different opinions on different topics, so try to be open-minded and be a patient listener.

We sometimes feel jealous about other so good sibling relationship, but it’s never late to take the first step to improve yours.  Being nice and still protecting your self-respect can be the key to your success. We all know that at the bottom of our heart we love our little devils (sisters and brothers).

Tuesday 27 November 2012


Our teeth give the structure to our face. Losing them might turn into a nightmare for us. Brushing flossing, seeing our dentist once in 6 months are the basic things we need to follow. Moreover, the reasons why all these are needed to be done, their proper procedure and their utter necessities are mentioned below:
Brushing twice a day is very important. We must do it to avoid any kind of bacterial germ build up from the left over of food in our mouth. We should brush for at least two minutes. It is said that 2 minute time can be enough for us to get rid of our tooth plaques. One should gently brush the head slowly in back-and-forth motions all over the outside top teeth, inside top, outside bottom and inside bottom for 30 seconds, each.  Do not put excess pressure as it may hurt your gums. Do a gentle massage over the gums and soft brush to clean your tongue to avoid bad breath. Change your brush after every 3 months.
Flossing helps you to clean your teeth fully; else, it will remain 40% clean. According to the dentist, flossing prevents tooth decay and periodontal diseases. Take care that the floss passes barely between the teeth and gently touches the gums. Thicker or waxed varieties should be preferred. Never jam them between your teeth as they may make your gums bleed.
Don’t use your teeth to open a bottle, or any tightly packed container. Stay away from foods that can stain. Some of the staining food items are blueberries, soy sauce, balsamic vinegar, tomato sauce, red wine, coffee, tea, and grape juice. Drink water to flush away the stains immediately after consuming such foods. Celery, carrots, apples, broccoli, lettuce, and spinach help in whitening your teeth, or providing a protective layer over it. So, make a habit of having them as often as you can.
If your gums are bleeding or you see plaques deposited in the inner side of your teeth or you see a swollen gum, visit a dentist immediately. These may be the signs of a serious oral disease. Take a routine check up after every 6 month to ensure your oral health. Maintain a proper posture to correct your jaw alignment. Touch your teeth while eating to prevent their clenching during your sleep.
Keep smiling.

Thursday 22 November 2012


Eyebrows define your face.  The most preferred eyebrow style, high-arched, is always not the ideal choice. Different face shapes look good in different shapes of eyebrows. It’s very important to choose the perfect eyebrow shape to achieve the best eye makeup while preparing yourself, whether for a party or office or hanging out with friends or just to get a perfect look.
There are different kinds of face structures. Most common of them are square face, round face, oval face, long face and heart shaped face. Choosing the best brows can be challenging. So, here are some tips to get an appropriate brow that will look young and polished on your face:
There are two types of square faces. One is the normal one and other is the long one. A moderately thick brow with a subtle arch suits both of the shapes well. This will make your forehead look wide and will also balance the proportion of your face. Try to avoid a high arc brow. It will look overpowering and will give an eye up look instead of eye out.
Round face beauties can feel blessed, as they have the flexibility of experimenting with their brows. But, it’s best to go with slim medium arch brow shape for all the round and round square faced ladies. It will help your face to thin out. It’s up to you that how skinny you want your brows to look. You can go for different thickness and find out what suits you the best.
According to the face proportions, an oval face lady can opt for the all time favorite, coveted high eyebrow.  Thinner high arches are really an attention-grabbing element. So, this power bro will definitely give you a pro look.
Long and long heart faces are always considered regal and elegant. To divert the attention from the ups and downs of the face, all those elegant faced ladies can go for a straight, medium thick brow with a very subtle arch. This will draw the eye-catch outwards and will give a flamboyance to your beauty. Never try a too arched or a curvy brow, as you won’t like a perma-surprised look.

Monday 19 November 2012


Life is all about knowing each other well and loving each other more, day by day. It sounds perfect but, the truth is bit different. The word perfect doesn't exist in a relationships. Nobody is flawless. Men and women have different views, needs and priorities. We all have our differences and that’s what makes us unique. But, sometimes these differences become hard to handle. It will be unwise to overlook the matter rather than clearing and accepting it. Whenever we tend to fall in hard times, we are feed with different opinions and various ways to tackle them, in turn the situation gets worse. And, some chronological ideas which can make a relationship tumble more are always on the run. So, I figured out some common myths about any relationship problem. Out of them, the most common two are stated below:
Make your life an open book to your life partner, seems to be the foremost choice of every couple, either being hooked up for an arranged marriage or starting a love relationship. But, before you do so, give a second thought to it. It can turn thing negatively, as everybody got a different outlook. It may create misunderstandings. Your words can get mis-interrupted.  You may reveal something that your partner can’t handle and realize later that those things would have been best kept secret. Think before you speak. Judge your partner’s mentality and then, open chapters of your life that he is more likely to accept.
Bottling up your emotions will create an unknown distance between couples. But, it won’t work most of the time. When the fire is up its not smart enough to put your finger in it or add some ghee to it. Keep patience. It’s the only way to achieve a successful relationship. If you tend to pour out your emotions while your partner is not in a mental state to accept it; it will only lead to unheard cries , as s/he is same as you. Let everything calm down and then clarify all the issues with a cool head.
Happily ever after is easy in fairy tales but, hard in real life and sometimes impossible. Act wise and complement each other. In that way you might get lucky to build the so-called perfect relationship.

Friday 16 November 2012


Most of the parents are conscious about the outside world. They make their babies aware of all the strangers, by warning them, not to talk to them, or walk with them, or have any eatables from them, or accept any gifts. But, according to the research conducted by BROSDI, a child gets abused mostly by someone they know. It can be a family member, an adult the family trusts or, sometimes by another child.

If any parent want to protect their child, it’s very necessary to talk with your child regarding sexual abuse. It may be tough for them but, it’s required for your child’s safety. If possible start updating about the facts as early as on age of 3 or 4. You should give them the knowledge about inappropriate touching. Tell them to report it to you, irrespective of the person who have done it; whether by a family member, teacher, coach, youth group leader or another child. Make then understand the difference between right and wrong and the necessity of reporting the wrong.

“No” or “Get away” or “Help” are the words that you must teach your child to use, whenever she is attacked. Tell them that if ever anything like this happens, it’s not their fault. Keep your communication level good and build the confidence of trust with her. Keep a close look on your child’s behavior, if you find anything unusual, dig the reason out. Make them feel safe. Encourage them to speak out their heart. Associate 2 or 3 trust worthy members of your family to speak with her and tell them to help her out to stay and feel safe. Don’t let your child be exposed to any sexually explicit materials.

Ask for help whenever you suspect any abuse, immediately. You can contact your local police department, or local rape crisis center, or child protective services or BROSDI

To lift up the confidence,  BROSDI says,“The best thing you can do for a child who has been abused is to get the child professional help right away,” and they are always there to help.
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Wednesday 14 November 2012


A Woman always crave to become more fashionable or trendy. In the way to do so they tend to end up buying the style magazines, for the updates and fashion advises. They take it on a monthly basis or on a weekly basis. Book an amount of money from the budget plan for this. But, have you all, beautiful ladies, ever given a thought that whether all these magazines are worth buying or not.
If you can’t reason your act  well, then it can be a useless expenditure and a waste of time. Buy a fashion magazine only, if you are on budget. Never hesitate to examine any style magazine before buying it. Go through the content list and a rough look on its contents. It can happen that you want something different and end up buying something else. There are different types of fashion ranging from modern style trends, 80's fashion trends to Gothic fashion trends, and so forth. look out for your type of fashion in the magazines. Check, whether it has any valuable information or only filled with advertisements. Be specific about your flavor. If you want any fashion tips or beauty tips, there are far better ways to get them. An internet connection can work as a miracle. There are vast numbers of online fashion publications and they offer a variety of options. And, the best part is, most of them are free of cost.
There are some common mistakes that people tend to do, is thinking, bigger the better. But, believe me, it is a bad notion. You can end up buying a larger magazine with no quality information in it. Try on, some small ones, as it says, good things do come in small packages. Check out if the magazine has more than 1-2 articles of your need, else it will be a total waste of money. Consult your friends and family member before selecting; they might suggest you well.
No doubt, fashion magazines are a great source for everything related to today’s trend but, there are cheaper way to acquire that knowledge like through internet, television and informational fashion shows. If you really need a style magazine, go buy it but, if it’s for just because, rethink your decision.

For more articles on fashion visit:

Wednesday 7 November 2012


“Nobody is perfect in this world. We all are unique because of our diverse, so never compare you to others. We all are beautiful in different ways.”
These were motivating lines my mother whispered in my years while I was a teenager  fighting with pimples and fat layers. I realized that everything is seasonal. If you take due care, it will only hurt for a while but, the future will be smooth. All this might sound emotional, nostalgic and boring. Its ok, it happens. At first, I too didn’t get what my mother wanted to convey. So, let me explain.
Most of the women get uncomfortable because of their flaws. But, what flaw is? Is it the fat on your abdomen, or your blemishes on face, or your fuller lip? Flaws are those things that make you different from others. Flaws define you. It makes you stand out in the crowd.
Never compare yourself to others. You can’t look like Kareena Kapoor or Katrina Kaif. But, the better part is they can’t look like you too. If you keep on comparing yourself, you will end up envying what you can’t have and will never acknowledge what you have got.
Love the person who you are. Imagine a world without flaws, you will find all similar faces and no specialties. If you are trying to change yourself or your originality by different methods that means you are trying to copy others. And, that’s not fair. Celebrate your individuality.
Stop running after those things which you can’t have but, rather act on those issues which are in your hand. If you have a dark complexion then, don’t run to fair it up, rather take care of your skin and make it glowing. Remember a healthy dark skin is appreciated more than an unhealthy fair skin. You can’t have a hour glass figure but, you can lose those extra flab. Go for a gym work out or aerobic exercises. Have healthy and balanced food. It will help you build a good physique. I believe, by being a supper skinny, you don’t want to faint under the pressure of your household or office work.
Cherish the person who you are. Start loving your mirror reflection. Feel beautiful, to look beautiful.

Thursday 1 November 2012


Marriages are made in Heaven. The most common words said by any parents to their daughters. But, how to know, which guy can be the perfect mate for you or with whom you can live happily ever after. If you are not in love or your intuitions are not guiding, then there are a few steps with which you can choose a better person for you.

It is always better to choose a partner with similar temperaments. Much research had been conducted where it’s prescribed to identify the compatibility of the couples with the help of following characteristics: Extroversion, Neuroticism, Agreeableness, Conscientiousness, Openness, Positive emotions, Negative emotions, Avoidance, Anxiety, Fearful–secure, Negativity of the self-model, Negativity of the other-model, Dismissing–preoccupied, Ego-resiliency and Dis-inhibition.

Two people can feel attracted to each other because of instinct, infatuation, love or just plain physical attraction. But that won’t resolve the problem because, love doesn't feed you. Before selecting a partner always try to think practically. Think of the most common issues that may arrive after your marriage. Let’s start with the finance. You are not asked to marry a millionaire, but a financially stable person must always be preferred. Select what are the things you would like to have in your life partner. Go for various dates more than once to know them better. Breaking a date is better than breaking a marriage. If you don’t like something about him, say it and see if he rectifies it or not. If he can’t adjust now, he won’t in the future. Never imagine your partner to change after marriage.

If you are a non-working woman then it won’t be tough for you to manage all the household works in a whole day, but if you are a working woman and don’t want to quit your career, then the scenario would be very different. You must resolve all those issues which may appear if you go out, to work. Try to talk out and divide the way the house will run, ranging from daily cooking and cleaning to washing and diving finances. If he is not willing to give you a hand in the house hold works, then the relationship might need a second thought. Go for a person with sound health as you will never want to marry a feeble guy and do all the pushing and pulling all by yourself or spend most of the day remembering his doctor's appointments and medicine names.

A marriage doesn't end between the individuals. Go for a family outing to see how well he blends with your parents or other family members. Have an ice-cream party with the neighborhood kids and see how comfortable he is with the kids. As you have to justify how well he will be the father of your future children or how can he act more like a son than son-in-law. Try to check out his friends, as we know birds of the same feather flocks together. You don’t have to go spying around him, but try to mingle with his fellows, in that way you can know him and his habits better. I believe you won’t feel like marrying a guy who is alcoholic or always gets a weak knee whenever a girl with short clothes passes by or a person with bad mouth.

Nobody beholds the future, but with a little bit of precautions and an extra research on your future spouse like their likes, dislikes, desires and goals for his future, may turn your current date to the would-be  prince charming of your life. 


The kitchen is the place where almost all women spend their most of the time. A functional and beautiful kitchen is what women crave for. The kitchen is the heart of the house. It’s the production section; therefore it’s really important that you keep it clean, as you won’t like any strange bacteria lurking around in your food. Organize your kitchen well. A clumsy kitchen will probably be the reason for your dining out and putting on those extra calories.

Arrange everything well. Sort out the things that you use almost every day and those that you haven’t used in years. Sell out the unused ones. Categorize your kitchen stuffs into cooking equipment, backing equipment, bakeware, cookware, appliances, knives and cutting board, cutlery  serving ware, glass and stem ware, paper and linens, storage equipment and cleaning equipment. Then, try to place them accordingly in their allotted spaces for easy usage.

A well lit kitchen always brightens up your mood. Make sure that your kitchen has a nice window from where fresh air and light can refresh it up. You can colour out your kitchen with a combination of warm a cool colours. It will add an extra vibrancy to the room. Try to avoid bulky coverings, both for windows and cabinets. Get a medium size sink along with a trash cabinet below it. It will make your kitchen look less messy. Replace all the heavy and grumpy looking containers with light weighted transparent one and level them (if you wish). After every use, wipe down your counters, stove top and cooking area. Take due care about all the cleaning equipment. Try to clean them on alternative days.

Go ahead and manage the wall space of your kitchen. A roof attached cabinet will make your room look smaller, try to avoid it. Instead, you can go for kitchen drawers. They are flexible and voluminous. Go for a 24” refrigerator and a 20 lit microwave. It will work out your purpose and will also consume less space.  Put your unprocessed foods together. Keep them away from any processed junk foods. Place a large bowl filled with fresh fruits near your blender. Take an extra emphasis to keep your refrigerator clean. Use different shelves for your uncooked poultry and fresh veggies. Try to plan your weakly meal according to the availability of the items. If possible put some motivational quotes on a healthy diet or a diet chart or cut of a fitness model. Believe me visualizing good habits help in actually practicing them.

For more articles on women health and fitness visit :-

Tuesday 30 October 2012


Indian culture or the Hindu culture whatever you say, is being misused by a lot of family. People ignore the main reasons behind the rituals. The most effected one within all of them is marriage. Some use it for their benefit and some fall in the traps of them. In all this the girl’s family is affected the most. They go to an ultimate position to maintain the pride and honour of the family or to ensure a false security and respect in her in-laws. Whatever anybody calls it, but I call it hypocrisy.

I am a Bengali girl in her marriageable age. I am my parents’ only daughter. My father died 3 years ago. Since my mom was a teacher in a private school she had managed most of the things. But my marriage is a big responsibility on her shoulders that she thinks would be hard to accomplish. Since I am a working woman too, our family finances are quite stable, but that doesn't change the peer pressure over us.

A marriage comes with an enormous list of expenses, especially on the girl’s family. With the price rise on high every commodity is too expensive. Whether you are doing arrangements for catering or preparing for “havan” you have to check all the minute details. There will be a long roll of gift items for the in-laws. Bridal grooming should have a lot of gold jewelry. Does anyone know the gold price? Does any one ever think that how an average middle class family can afford all this? Can anyone tell the meaning of the “shloks” recited during the “havan” or why a “havan” is performed? What is the relation between the foods served in a marriage with girl’s family status? If dowry is illegal, then why anybody should ask for gifts?

A marriage becomes a gossip ground. Air filled with criticisms. The in-laws fighting for silly things and insult the bride’s family. There is an endless list of complains about the quality of clothes, the food, and so on. Their behaviors levy the fact that having daughter is a curse. They try to impose that any violation is an act of disbelief toward the Indian culture. All these are the work of Moral police and selfish people who in the name of culture loot people around them.

It may not end here. Excluding all the after marriage demands, the great problem knocks the door when your daughter gets pregnant. In her third trimester she is sent to her parents’ house where she is most pampered, but it got a dark side too. Some in-laws do so to avoid the expense and responsibility of the maternity homes and the afterbirth concerns. How immoral that can be.

I am against all this. Call me a feminist or what so ever, but I am just a normal girl who just wants a simple marriage. I don’t want to spend a great heap of money to impress anyone. Like me the person who I am not by how much I can spend. My morals, sacra-mentality, ethics and deeds should be the reason of choosing me. My parents also have faced the same hardship as the boy’s. There are no reasons to put my head down and do all the silly things to maintain a false dignity/status.


The divorce rate is rising in India. The specter of divorce is haunting us all. From Kolkata to Chennai or Punjab to Kerala, the upper classes to the middle classes or metros to semi-urban areas, all are affected by it. Why is this sudden increase in the divorce rate? A lot of variable are acting here. Today’s India has learned to accept the divorces. The parents of the divorced daughters have started to believe that their daughter can also have a life after marriage or without a husband. Women have become financially independent. They have learned to provide reasons to all those judgmental friends and relatives queries. Their moral empowerment helps them to end an abusive relationship, ignoring all the hurdles they may face in the future. Couples have learned to give each other enough time to understand their differences before deciding to become parents.  So that they can get separated it they don’t feel compatible and are also, not held back by the fear of its impact on children.

The drastic change in today’s working environment has created a lot of impact on relationships. In most of the cases both individuals (husband and wife) are working professionals. The increasing competition between different companies, create a huge stress on the individuals. This stress can build frustration and tension which may destroy a marriage, whether one partner is working, or both of them. If a man marries a working woman he should prepare his mind to share the household works too. But it happens rarely. Men tend to think women’s career a temporary thing whereas women expect their husbands to do household works. If wife is working late they expect their husband to manage the home although it’s a myth. In some instances where wife earns more than husband, creates inferiority complex in husband and sometime wife starts to think of their husband, less worthy.

But if anybody thinks that to resolve this problem wife should sacrifice her career and liberty, then they are absolutely wrong. If it’s the only option, then why shouldn’t husbands do so? Though it’s not possible, as most of the men prefer, being the bread-winners. And, most women don’t want to get bonded again in the shackles of lost identity and ignorance. All these attitude problems give rise to divorce. Young generations are educated enough. They are well aware of the laws. They know how to retain their freedom. The whole thought process towards marriage have changed. People like to remain good friends after divorce than a bad husband/wife while married. Divorce is a cupcake for them; all it matters is a healthy life.

Monday 29 October 2012


Gone are those days when children used to believe that babies fall from the skies. In today’s world children are extra eager and curious. They are very conscious about every minute changes, whether in the surrounding or within their body. To acquire the knowledge regarding the change they can go to any extent and this is where teachers and parents should act. Most of the time young girls become really very conscious about their sudden physical change. They experience sexual changes, sexual desires, and sexual demands. Hormones rushing through their vein make the impatient. They tend to get themselves fooled by this. All the emotions jumbled they can’t distinguish between right or wrong. So if these changes are not channeled into an acceptable behavior, they might end up being the victims of early sexual experimentation, which may hurt them.

Most of the parents are not open to their children. They tend to force them to avoid all these or remark them as a bad thing. They try to keep an eye on them that whether they are mingling with any of opposite sex. But all these can’t suppress their curiosity. They search for other ways to fulfill their knowledge. They lay their hands on porn sites, which not only gives them a bad idea about everything but also push them into the darker sides. They might try out their friend or a bit seniors for further details. But all these will make the situation worse.

Parents and teachers should provide them with the sex education, the exact knowledge about everything. You can’t expect a 12 year old, first time menstruating girl, to understand or react maturely to what’s happening. Its a parent’s and teacher’s duty to let them know that sexual feelings are a natural part of growing up. It’s nothing to be afraid of, nothing to be ashamed of or nothing to be proud of. They should realize that social networking sites can be addictive and can also interfere with children’s studies. But to combat that parents and teachers cannot control the child's life, but can protect them by laying down some rules which will not only protect them, but will also provide them their space for enjoyment. Always try to hear what they want to say. Answer their queries well and ensure that they are well guided. Girls should be more aware of all this. They must be made aware of their sexuality and vulnerability. What are the taboos and why should they be followed? It’s very necessary for the parents and teachers to allow boys and girls to interact with each other from an early age so that when they are adults, the opposite sex is not a mystery that has to be unraveled. All these have to be done with extra care because you won’t want the child to say "yes mom" or "yes dad" or "yes mam" and do all those no-no stuffs at your back due to their ignorance.

Sex education for young adults has been ignored for a long time, which has already done a great damage. From a burgeoning AIDS crisis, to exponential population growth and young folk with repressed sexuality and stunted mentalities are the results of the ignorance. By taking a proper step at the proper time, may heal the bruises of the ignorance, brought in the society.

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Saturday 27 October 2012

I only get jealous because I love you

In true love there is no place for jealousy. Love is always so unconditional.  In a serious relationship like marriage jealousy can create a lot of problems. Jealousy is most of the time considered a female stuff, but after marriage it shifts its position. Post marriage jealousy and possessiveness are mostly referred by the male section as protectiveness.

A woman is bonded by a lot of factors after marriage. Along with her she has to manage her household works, her kids, in-laws and her husband. After taking care of all this, a very less time is left for her. At those times she prefers to go for an outing or travel somewhere or practice her hobbies. There might be some opposite sex friends with her same sex friends with whom she might want to go out with and this sometime brings chaos in her married life. Most of the husbands don’t like his wife having male friends, or be late at work or go for a night out or travel alone or with her friends only. They try to reason these activities with an excuse of her security and responsibilities. But it is not the whole truth. Their insecurity and jealousy are the main reasons.

The main question that arises in this kind of scenario is, if a boy can do all those stuff then, why a girl can’t. She is of the same age and matures enough to handle any problem. Why girls have to sacrifice her desires only? If she can take care of the house and its people all the time then, why can’t a boy does so for the sake of her happiness?

One should never forget that before being a married couple they are individuals. Nobody should take each other for granted or get involved so much that you tend to put pressure on the other to consider himself/herself as their world. There is no harm in hanging out with others. One should have the trust over his/her partner. Though a marriage is a big event in everybody’s life, but it’s not life. It’s good enough to take a break from your daily routine. It can give anybody the zeal to adapt and adjust in a better way. But there is no reason to act like a psycho or try to control your partner’s life. Everybody needs some of their personal space to live in peace of mind. But one thing should be taken care of that never change your priorities over night. One should get back to their usual life at the end of it.

Friday 26 October 2012


“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot”
A well known quote from Groucho Marx describes the exact feeling of most of the men in our society. But the truth is a bit different. It might be hard to understand a woman, but not impossible. From the ages women are considered a mysterious character. The main reason behind it is their concealed personality and non-descriptive explanations of their feelings to her mate.

Studies prove that there are differences between ways of showing love of a woman and a man. This difference is not in the quantity of love for each other. Women generally tend to express her love by enacting fewer negative or antagonistic behaviors, whereas men show love by initiating sex, sharing leisure activities, and doing household work together with their wives. As she understands her life partner by the nature and behavior he shows toward issues, she also expects the vice versa. But it becomes harder for men to understand their women if she doesn’t speak out her mind clearly. And that turns out to be the biggest problem as most of the women are shy and their dignity doesn’t allow them to explain their desires to the fullest. So most of the guys search for a straight forward girl. Women want their men to be caring and protective but at the same time liberal and passionate.

To impress any woman, men have to be charming, ambitious, self confident, well built and have the capacities to understand her despite her indirect ways of expressing herself. The major deal for the men grows when his better half wants him to change as per her wish. She expects this as she can mold herself in the way her partner wishes her to be. This, demanded change is most of the time considered in a negative manner as men don’t like change. But in fact all she wanst is a balanced relationship and a mutual understanding in it.

Women have an innate sense of picking out leaders form a group. To pull this off, men have to work on their alpha personality. They have to make themselves look more valuable.Women don’t want men to worship them and that’s the reason they reject the proposals of their admirers. All men have to do is to be down to earth, but at the same time make themselves stand out in the crowd. They have to be good, both in and out of beds. Women love to love those men who are good money managers and honest about their whereabouts.

Although with all these facts a man can understand a woman, but as Oscar Wilde had said “Woman are made to be loved, not understood".


The most beautiful time in a women’s life is pregnancy. She gets herself pampered and loved. All this care helps in putting on weight. After the delivery of the child, a woman starts to bother about getting a flat tummy and lose the extra kilos.
The best way to lose those flabs is by breastfeeding. There is a myth that breastfeeding stimulates the fat deposition, but it’s totally wrong. A woman can lose up to 500 calories in a day by breastfeeding. Women in a postnatal stage should try to continue it as long as they can because it’s equally helpful for both, child and mother for their fitness.

Most of the women tend to engage themselves in some diet restrictive weight loss programs during the early days of motherhood, but that’s not ideal.  After pregnancy the body needs nutrition and additional energy. A balanced diet meal and snacks, without too much fat or sugar should be taken, ranging from breads, pasta, cereals, rice, vegetables, legumes and fruits to cheese, milk, yogurt, lean meat, poultry, fish, eggs, nuts and seeds. Never ever skip meals, instead of that eat frequently. Divide food regime into small meals throughout the day. At least 10 glasses of water should be taken every day. Never confuse the thirst pangs with hungry pangs. Avoid snacking or over eating. Get enough sleep as it regulates the hormones that control the appetite.

After a birth to a child, the body needs time to recover. Normally a woman can start exercising after 6 weeks, but in a case of cesarean it might take a bit longer. Never indulge in any kind of heavy exercises as it can cause vaginal bleeding (lochia) or turn bright red. Gentle exercise including pelvic floor exercises and lower tummy muscles curls, accompanied with Kegel exercises are the best things to start with. All this will also help with evading bladder problems. If the mother is suffering from diastasis, then regular sit ups or oblique curls should be avoided. Instead of that Pelvic Tilt can be practiced. Every day try to go for a brisk walk for 10-15 minutes.

To look after the baby properly a mother needs a sound mind and body. So never forget to love your body as much as you love your baby. Stay fit!

Thursday 25 October 2012


Human trafficking can be defined as an illegal trade of human beings. This is done for commercial sexual exploitation or forced labor  or surrogacy or for the removal of organs or tissues or ova.

The Protocol to Prevent, Suppress and Punish Trafficking in Persons, especially Women and Children was adopted by the United Nations in Palermo, Italy in 2000, and is an international legal agreement attached to the United Nations Convention against Transnational Organized Crime. It is also referred as Trafficking Protocol. The Trafficking Protocol was put into action from 25 December 2003. By June 2010, it had been ratified by 117 countries and 137 parties but India didn’t ratify it.

In India women are trafficked to different part of the country and to abroad also. They are bought and sold with impunity. This trafficking of women and children violates the human rights, women's rights and individual’s rights to life, dignity, security, privacy, health, education and redressal of grievances.

The trafficked individuals are traumatized by what they have experienced. Malevolence and helplessness becomes main characteristic of the mental and emotional state of the survivors. In our Indian society girls are made to bear the obligation of upholding the family honour through their sexual chastity and this prevalent morality puts an additional stress to the girl. All this leads to post-traumatic stress disorder, depressive disorder, dissociative disorders and psychotic disorders.

It was published in Statesman that around 2 million children are abused and forced into prostitution every year in India. An NGO called End Children’s Prostitution in Asian Tourism reported a data that among 2 million prostitutes in India, 20 per cent among them are minors.Sometimes women voluntarily get them involved in this. The main factor responsible, for this kind of act, is the desperate socio-economic condition of the women. To get a financial security women tend to fall in the trap of the traffickers.

To curb these crimes against women, government of India has taken the steps through a detail prosecution, protection and prevention. Through the Immoral Trafficking Prevention Act (ITPA) penalties are ranging from seven years’ to life imprisonment. The affected individuals are sent to rehabilitation by the government.  


A voluntary organization working for women empowerment was established in 1979 by a group of young activists under the motivation of Brother Gaston Dayanand at Bhangar, District South 24 Parganas, West Bengal. It started with 2 members and within 2 decades more than 700 workers and volunteers got involved in implementing the multi-faceted activities of the organization. SHIS had commenced their journey in tea stall where the first clinic was founded and their main focus was about tuberculosis. They had made a remarkable growth and further diversification in socio-economic, health, education & self-sustained community development in the recent years. M. A. Wohab and Sabitry Pal along with Brother Gaston Dayanand and Dominique Lapierre (the key people of the organization) have succored the needy through tuberculosis control program, eye care, sanitation, arsenic free pure drinking water, mother and child care, Herbal Plantation, Micro Credit Facilities, education, providing aids to the deprived ones, women empowerment, rehabilitating criminals, pollution and environment, disaster management and others.
Today SHIS is expanded to 36 blocks of West Bengal, which includes 2463 villages and 10.5 million populations. Their main action areas are Uttar Dinajpur, Dakshin Dinajpur, Coochbehar, North 24 Parganas, South 24 Parganas, Murshidabad, Jalpaiguri, Malda, Birbhum and Nadia.
As per the organization, their vision is to:-
  • Build a value oriented sustainable society
  • Envisage a society free from evils of poverty, illiteracy, social injustice, and class or creed difference.
  • Tackling poverty not just economically, but socially too. 
  •  Education and social awareness.
  • Reaching the unreached ones.
  • People's participation.
  • Women as central figure in programs.

    To achieve their visions different activities are performed by them. Some of them are formations of a self help group, whose main focus is on women’s rights awareness and micro credit projects; Mobile Health Care Service; Mobile Boat Dispensary; Reproductive and child health Programs; Girls Academy for unprivileged ; Institutional delivery centers and Community health worker training centers.

    These noble acts of the organization were not over looked by the government. They were  awarded with "24 Ghanta Anonya Sanmaan 1418" on 27th August 2012, Indira Gandhi Seva Ratna Award  2012, Begum Rokea Award 2011,Asia Pacific Excellence on 21 May 2011 in service to mankind, "Unsung Heroes of Compassion, 2009" in San Francisco, in April 2009 and a lot more.

    With such a magnanimous effort of SHIS a refurbished countryside of West Bengal would be an exquisite acclimation.

Wednesday 24 October 2012


It is said that you can judge a person by the shoe they wear. Gone are those days where shoes for women are considered only in terms of mere comfort. In these few decades, women have evolved a lot. A high heel to attain a taller look only, is an antiquity. Women plunging into fashion magazines and designer collections as their indigence, know how to build their shoe wardrobe. Fashion being their world, they have become the trend makers. This emphatic gesture of them outlawed the limitation of glamour, only to fashion houses, film industry or high class people.
Walking on heels that suit the dress, body structure and day to day routine of a woman, make a woman look classy. It has become a fashion statement to wear a higher heel. Heels define women, from funky to elegant or from vibrant to reserve.Most of the women wear them because of personal preference, while others do to make their legs look taller. Ranging from kitten heels to suede stiletto heels as formals; ruffled peep-toe heels to studded sling back platform heels for parties andembroidered flower booties to lace-up suede platform for vacation, conquer their wardrobes.
At hangouts, girls wearing a dressy shoe with a funky pattern, like alligator skin, paired with a simple blouse and neutral trousers or jeans; cocktail parties, gushing with matured women in closed-toe, open-toe, or strappy heels; a bossy round on three inches brown and black leather shoe at the office corridor or a clicking entry into a meeting; or a glossy looks complemented by a golden Serra Spike Curved Heel Wedges or a red Yamila02 Strappy Rhinestone High Heels, add a flamboyance in their personality and make them stand out among a crowd. Kurt Geiger platforms or chunkier platform heeled boots are always making a way through in the minds of adventurous ladies.
An art of perfectly accessorizing and accenting oneself with a pair of extremely stunning - high heels, imaginative designs, and brilliant shoe silhouettes, is now mastered by all women. We can see women going bonkers on trendy footwear or exploring the complement quotient, in most of the showrooms. They like to swagger their wardrobe, with outfits matching their shoes. So by overcoming all the wobbling and sprains, we welcome you to an era of Miss long legs.

Thursday 18 October 2012


Who are beautiful? Can beauty be defined? What’s the secret lies between being beautiful or not?
Most of the women in our society crave for a gorgeous look. But that doesn’t make them beautiful. Beauty lies within you. It can solely be achieved through enlightenment, self realization and confidence. Due to the chronicles of aggravation faced by women for ages, they have clandestine themselves. They feel neglected and unworthy. They are always considered the weaker section of the society. But, what’s the reason behind it? Can we accuse any single section of our society for this wretched condition of women? No, we can’t. In this male dominated society it’s the responsibility of a woman to make her existence worthy.

A spiritual development and growth of mind can only bring change in her state. She must know that in the eyes all almighty we all are equal. We are also bestowed by a beautiful life and we must respect it. The Almighty has given us a blessing, i.e., the capacity to bring a life on earth. We are the consoler. We give shelter to the needy in our heart and pamper them with passion and love. We are rewarded with the power of tolerance. Aren't all these reasons enough to make us feel special?

If any of us feel like comparing, then she might be taking a wrong turn. We balance the nature. We complete each other by being each other’s better halves. If men possess physical strength, then women have mental strength. In the court of almighty the judgment is fair. We are, equally rewarded for the good deeds and punished for the bad ones. There is no biasness in the eyes of God, so who are we to create one in our mind. Wrong things do happen in every bodies life, but that doesn't mean we should stop living or believing the facts. If required we have to earn our self respect back. We must believe in ourselves. If nobody is there, we need to boost up our confidence by self appreciation. We need to be confident and strong in every sector of our life.

We must regard ourselves unique before we dig into the eyes, souls and minds of others for it. Every person in this world is extraordinary. Then again, to notice it we must own an insight. It’s easy to accept bereavement, but hard to struggle for it. We should be glad to be a woman. It’s a prerequisite to admire this lovely creation of God.

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Tuesday 16 October 2012



Today I got my final result. I rushed home to share it with my parents. I flung the door open and shouted "Ma I got 68%, the treat should be biryani". But she looked embarrassed by my behavior and dragged me to the bedroom, dressed me up with a green sari and handed me a plate full of pakoras and 5 cups of tea. Before I could say anything, she escorted me to the drawing room where my baba (father) was having a discussion with 4 unknown people in a very obliged tone. Ma (mother) pushed me to offer the pakoras and tea to them. Then, they started asking me different questions about my likes and dislikes. Before I could understand anything, they congratulated us and each other and left the house.

My marriage got fixed and was scheduled on 19th of November. The whole house started buzzing with people. My ears heard their hum, but couldn't understand what all the fuss was about. In all this, I remained silent. I tried to shout at a top of my voice that I don't want to marry now. I had my career to build. I had my dreams waiting for me, to get fulfilled. But I felt my voice choked. I stood in the middle and remained dumb. I could only see the glittering eyes of my parents. I dropped a tear and said "Here start my journey of sacrifices".
[In our typical Indian society, parents think that marriage of their little girl is the most important thing. It’s a responsibility, which every girl parents’ grant as a sole requirement of her. Career building is always optional, if the girls’ in-laws allow her.]

Days turned into months and I got married. My father-in-law got a transportation business and my husband Rahul, is a custom officer. They earn more than enough for the family. There was no need of any lady member of the family to go out for any job. But it was not about having a job. It was all about my career, identity and existence. I did my M.A. in geology not just to cook food. I couldn’t  be like my mother-in-law, who sacrificed her teaching career as a geography teacher in KVs for the family. Days passed by and the urge to build my career made me impatient. My daily household work was monotonous to me.
[Most of the women after marriage get so busy in learning the house-hold works, adapting the family customs, updating the knowledge about their husband and in-laws choices, they keep forgetting their dreams]

t was Saturday night. My mother-in-law was teaching me how to cook chicken razzela. She was giving me tips how to manage the house. I suddenly popped the question to her, "Majhi, in all these years, you never felt to build your career?" She became stunt and after few seconds looked at me. Her eyes said everything. But that day it was like nobody can stop me to speak out my feelings. I said, "I want to build my career. I got an offer of project assistant in GSI. They will be paying me 12000/- per month. Can I do it?" She was silent. I completed marinating the chicken and kept it aside. She told me to leave it for the night. We all had our dinner. She asked me to bring the desert. I was alone in the kitchen with questions pumping into my head. Would I be allowed to pursue my career? Was she upset with me? Did every woman have to scarify their dreams after marriage? Was there no professional future for any women? I served the desert. Suddenly my father-in-law stood up and hugged me. I stood there confused. With a smiling face he said, "Beta you are like a daughter to us. You can do whatever you like. Go ahead and build your career, we all are there with you." I was overwhelmed. Tears rolled down from my ears. I didn’t know what she had said or how she did it, but I was really happy.
[An educated woman, as an in-law in a family, plays a vital role. They can understand the urge, to build a career, by the young female members of the family. It leads to women empowerment in India]

I went to sleep and waited for the morning. I prayed and thanked to god in whatever possible ways. I knew it would be hard for me to manage both my family and work, but it was not impossible. I felt blessed to have such in-laws as I know a lot of women have to sacrifice their dreams after marriage. In this male dominated world it was always tough for a married woman to go ahead with their career. Different responsibilities come upon them. It takes years to adjust and get accustomed with the in-laws. And, with these years passing by their dreams fades too. These thoughts kept buzzing in my head and I didn't know when I was asleep.

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Self-defense is a counter act to defend oneself from any harm. It’s one of the best weapons of a woman in this world, against violence. It can also help, to curb crime against womenSelf defense is basically of two types- mainly physical and verbal.

Physical self defense is an act where one’s physical force or physique  is used to counter an immediate threat of violence. It can be armed or unarmed. The most of the unarmed measures mostly include martial art techniques. You have to know your body well and use it in need.You have know how to avoid a punch or kick or hand locks or dogging the opponent attacks. The armed measures mainly involve, use of small knife, tactical flashlight, tactical pen, pepper spray, stun gun, or a small impact weapon on the attacker. But if you don’t poses them, you can use, some of your daily usable stuffs, as your weapon, like aerosol sprays(deodorants) or stones and sticks or a bat, utensils and vases (if attacked at home).

Your wit, presence of mind and common sense play a important role in self defense. Rising the volume of your voice against the people tries to be harass you (sharp and loud shirk);or use of some strong and bold words like no-go away; or addressing someone suddenly as thief, can shock the attacker. You can also tackle the situation by playing with your words (all the attackers might not be an unknown person for you or can he more powerful than you). You can divert the topic of the attacker to a less interesting one to him or by accepting the proposals at that moment you can manage to flee from the place, so that, you are safe to protest against it later. All the above are the act of de-escalation (kind of verbal self defense) and avoidance.

We know it's easy to say, but hard to implement. At a situation of stress, pressure and fear, it's tough to keep the calm and act accordingly. But you can prepare yourself with help of different self defense classes. You can know where these self defense classes take place f
rom your local clubs, government firms or school authorities. They will teach you to defend yourself and will also help you in practicing it. It's more like solving sample papers, before you fall in a place, to give the exam. Thus, it will help you morally, to be prepared, for most of the likely conditions.

We all pray to god that we never have to face such a situation in our life. But if in future we ever come across such a situation, then we must know that we are not alone. Our laws are with us, who gives us the right to carry instruments of self defense or take any legal action on the attacker. We can also protect ourselves, by using simple gadgets, like home security system, armored car or a guard dog. We must remember that, over doing of any defensive act or fighting, is not considered, as an act of self defense and is not supported by the law too. Always try to have a sharp ear for the incoming footsteps of any 
pervert. All this may lead you to an empowerment of womenSo, live well and live safe. 

Saturday 13 October 2012


Reservation for women in government jobs and democratic institutions like legislative assemblies and Parliament has been a hot topic for debate since ages. Though often reservation is a populist policy of a government but still there is the necessity to discuss the rationale behind such policy.

The current status of women as compared to that of men in our society is not at all satisfactory. Providing reservation to women can be a medium of offering opportunities to them but in the mean while it may risk building an acute sense of positive discrimination and an inferiority complex in them, like identifying them as the paralyzed section of the society who need support to survive in this competitive world.

Many political parties try to solve this issue of inequality between the genders by the help of reservation but there are many complex reasons for the disappointing socio, political & economical profile of Indian women in the society which cannot be resolved only by the help of reservation for women. Although reservation quota for women will increase the number of women in schools, colleges or offices.This gradual change of attitude towards women can be a boon for those women having potential but lacking in proper opportunities.

A very common question which arises is that was women's position in the society always like this? No, it was not; because in the Vedic period women used to hold a very high place. But for centuries Indian society has been a male dominated one and this era is believed to have started in later Vedic period and its condition worsened by the medieval period.

In spite of the fact that India is a developing country but it’s very upsetting to view the low development and involvement ratio of women in different sectors of national activity. Thus the reservation policy for empowerment of women, can only be a temporary relief but to eradicate the inequality between the genders, broader and stronger political, social and economic policies are required.